For children with life, "spiritual software"

100 individuals with 100 kinds of family and education, our ancestors are an independent in a state of being brought up education. We found that the methods and experience of many individuals can not generally applicable, we must find home education with the regularities can be followed for the public.



If the parents of the child mind to establish an absolute duty to believe the child unconditionally loves his parents, I believe all the criticism of parents, in recognition of the departure is good for themselves, if the child in the subconscious to fully believe this, then the relationship is positive is mutual love, mutual support and understanding of the stability of the relationship.



In this case, all educational children's most simple things, with the Soviet Union, the words of great educator Sukhomlinski is "with child growth." However, most real-life parent-child relationship is unstable, or distorted, the child can not really trust the parents.



What parents want their children, what tasks to complete?



Too many parents focus on children's learning, in fact it is primarily the school thing. For many parents and schools should do, blind on the go, such as helping children with homework, checking children's homework and supervise their children and so on. In the end fruitless, duplication of efforts. I think many of our parents are worthless, we are kind of the other families, the shortage of its own home field. Not to do things their own good. As parents, we want to accomplish is to develop children's self-esteem, confidence, responsibility, initiative and enterprising spirit, interest in learning and good habits. This is the core spirit of the six children growing software, if they did not handle the child is doomed to problems of.



The first child to Xiang into the life of software is the "pride"



When children begin to respect themselves and others, like themselves as people to respect the equality of the time, the children of the main character was built up. Self-esteem is the backbone of the child's spiritual personality. If the child does not build self-esteem, other provincial judge he would not care to see him, he do not know how to see other people's eyes, he would not heart to study the behavior of the crowd rules, he also will not seek other people's respect and recognition Thus there will be no upward mobility. To educate children through the critical point is meaningless. Because he did not care for your opinion, your criticism of him does not work. No self-esteem of children will not actively participate in group activities, do not respect others, do not respect themselves, not the desire to excel in the group. It should be said, self-esteem is a child's life, the fire, the origin of the child grow up. Self-esteem is not established, the child's life is equivalent to the fire did not ignite, so he will not have to grow.



The best way to establish the child self-esteem is to respect children, their children and themselves as fully equal human beings. When parents respect their children, he began to respect themselves, and then he will respect others. That his "people" of the process to start. The establishment of a second child self-esteem is important to love their children unconditionally. When parents love their children unconditionally, when the children's self-esteem will increase, he began to feel very good, and then will have to seek more power.



The second is to build software, children's "self-confidence"



Raise children's self-confidence of the parents can not be said to be a lifelong task, at least 25 children before the age of the task. Before leaving the parents of the child, parents should take good care of eyes and love as the child's self-confidence. Self-confidence is a dynamic process, establish a continuous process. Means that a person can not always have confidence once and for all, he must at all times to develop their own self-confidence.



Self-confidence is to do something when a person's subjective state of mind. He can play with confidence and even their ability to mobilize the potential to do things successfully. If the analogy, the equivalent of self-confidence into the main computer program of pre-op procedures. If there is no self-confidence of a child, when he faced one problem, his brain is a subsystem to enter, start the program is to explain why not cook this question, why did I not do. And have confidence to enter the main operator can program his brain's attention will focus on problem solving methods, after a period of time can always make out the problem. So confidence is a child can do things (ie learning), can get things done on the core and psychological procedures.



Yes, we understand self-confidence is not so simple chest rise. It is the people doing psychological operations program: a self-confident students, who face the questions, the brain will go into the question of the internal to the operation conditions and results to find a causal relationship, to do the title; if not self-confident child, see the problem at higher or lower on the surface will stay in student issues, the problem of the stress and feeling anxious mood, and then think: how this issue so difficult? Why do the questions the teacher? I can not make my mom approved, how would I? Results for 20 minutes in the past, he did not do title, but was thinking something else and feel the pain. Finally he reached the discussion: Do you think I do not mathematics Well, I still do!



The third spirit of the software is "responsible"



Responsibility is a child and other people aware of their mutual relations generated subjective state of mind. When a person's behavior with other people's pain, joy the causal link, its very value of this contact time, it produced a sense of responsibility. The speech of a child in the classroom affect other students, if he has a sense of responsibility in the classroom would not speak.



Responsibility is divided into internal and external accountability. External sense of responsibility to others for example, the family, the community. We talk about the children's own sense of responsibility, we have too many parents do not establish a sense of responsibility in the minds of children, not make children responsible for their actions, then we look at control, to force, so that my child the responsibility of life borne by the parents to come. Parents when the police, the child became a thief, we have been in the back of supervision. If your child build their sense of responsibility and responsible oversight of parents we can be lifted. Sense of responsibility did not establish that a child is absolutely impossible to aggressive! Children will become passive, parents pushing what he move a muscle.



The fourth mental software is "positive and progressive spirit"



If the children themselves to grow their own to learn, then educate their children is too simple a thing. Educators Suhomlinski the former Soviet Union that "learning" is a mental, and mental characteristics, the worker must be in "active state" to study well. If you do not take the initiative and enterprising spirit, the child can not learn good. In a market economy, if we do not nurture the child's actions and enterprising spirit, then the future is absolutely impossible for a child successful in life. Did not take the initiative and enterprising spirit, it means that a child not interested in life, no interest in life, not on self-interest of all are not interested in the people dispirited, then the child is not possible to grow up mentally.



The fifth spirit of the software is "interest in learning"



I read in college educators to write the Soviet Union the "learning and interest" of the book, after reading it become clear. Where the basic concept is that: interest is learned, not innate.



The so-called interest is when the kids are doing these acts, he can feel happy, not willpower forced himself to do, called the interest in the formation of auto-response. If the child's nervous system in the brain and do homework on a subject will have the joy of conditioning, learning interest arises. This behavior is trained, and children for the first time to do what this behavior is not happy, repeated acts, and finally can not will power, conditioning things to do, the re-caused by parental praise, encourage children to find a happy, long time, the formation of auto-response, and each act of any child can find a resort feel comfortable. At this point, the so-called interest arises.



We have too many parents think that children learn most have the will, in fact, outstanding children learn is by no means will power to learn. Children to read at night to one or two o'clock, because the interest in reading, not sleeping, not feeling tired. With willpower, if it is absolutely impossible to achieve! Therefore, we conclude that, for children, wants to make children learn better, learning interest is the prerequisite first. The interest in learning is the need to train parents of small children.



The sixth mental software is "good practice"



Habits that do not will power can make automatic response. Good habits are one quick success of the fast lane. Real living people to learn, for example a lot of good master, doctoral students, professors, no one is by the will to learn. Used to decide a person's daily behavior, which determines the daily flight of his achievements.



Summarized this view, our task is to parents of the child's brain, inserting it into the spirit of the software. Parents like the program entry clerk, a child just like the factory's computer hard drive has not been formatted, need a Road entered into the program before you can use independently. Child only became an independent who was able to walk normally in the community!